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Elon Musk Declares George H. W. Bush a "Globalist Traitor": Says Liberating Kuwait Was “Unpatriotic, Low-Yield Content”

March 27, 2025 — Mars Prep HQ, aka Elon’s Basement Tunnel No. 3

In his ongoing effort to rewrite history with the accuracy of a cracked Magic 8-ball, Elon Musk took to X (formerly Twitter, formerly a bird, now mostly a troll farm) to denounce President George H. W. Bush as a “traitor to America” for his role in liberating Kuwait during the Gulf War.

“Bush 41: Fought in WWII, but betrayed his country as President,” Musk posted at 2:12 a.m., sandwiched between retweets of cat memes and a thread about why traffic lights are part of a globalist psy-op.
“Using AMERICAN blood and treasure to save Kuwait? Pure treason. We didn’t vote for Kuwait. #AmericaFirst #BushDidKuwait”

The post received 1.2 million likes in under an hour, mostly from anonymous accounts with profile pics of muscle-bound eagles holding assault rifles, and bios that say things like “Jesus. Gasoline. Freedom.”

Hero or Globalist Tool?

Though George H. W. Bush was a decorated WWII pilot, having been shot down over the Pacific and awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross, Musk dismissed his military valor as “mid-tier combat engagement” and “irrelevant to the algorithm of true patriotism.”

“We shouldn’t be fighting wars for oil-rich monarchies. That’s what Tesla charging stations are for,” Musk added in a follow-up post.
“America should’ve stayed home, built a few giga-factories, and let Kuwait figure it out. What happened to minding our own GDP?”

When someone pointed out that the Gulf War had near-universal international support and was considered a swift, successful military operation, Musk replied:

“Yeah, and BlackBerry had international support too. Didn’t stop it from being obsolete. Wars should be crowd-funded and livestreamed.”

The “Bush Betrayal Index™”

Musk also announced the launch of a new algorithm-driven platform called the Bush Betrayal Index™, which scores past presidents on how much of their term was “wasted helping foreigners instead of monetizing American exceptionalism.”

According to the algorithm:

  • George H. W. Bush: 9.3/10 on the traitor scale

  • George W. Bush: 7.1 (but “he did invent oil-based democracy,” so bonus points)

  • Donald J. Trump: 0.1 (“for loving America so much he tried to stay president forever”)

The rating system is currently being offered as an NFT on the blockchain, in case you're both confused and too rich.

Political Fallout: "Did He Just Call Bush a... What?"

The response from conservatives was mixed.

Some longtime Republicans were stunned.

“We might have disagreements about policy,” said former Bush advisor Marlin Fitzwater, “but calling a WWII hero and former CIA director a ‘traitor’ for stopping Saddam Hussein from annexing Kuwait? That’s a hell of a hot take. Even for a guy who launched a car into space instead of reading a history book.”

Others, however, embraced the narrative.

Fox’s 3 a.m. show “UltraPatriot After Dark” ran a segment titled:
“Was Operation Desert Storm Just Biden’s First Draft?”

Kuwait Responds: “Thanks, We Guess?”

The Kuwaiti Ministry of Defense issued a statement reading simply:

“We thank the United States for its support in 1991. As for Mr. Musk, we hope he finds peace in whatever dimension of the internet he’s currently living in.”

They also added a subtle jab, tweeting, “Our Teslas here still cost too much, btw.”

Musk: “I Stand By My Take—Bush Helped the Wrong Sandbox”

In a final late-night post, Musk doubled down:

“Imagine how many flamethrowers we could have built with the money spent on Kuwait. Instead, we spilled American oil on foreign sand. Not smart. Not meme-worthy. Very low engagement presidency.”

He then signed off with a meme of Bush photoshopped into a camel, captioned: "Desert Traitor. 🐫🇺🇸"

Final Thought: The Future Is Elon, The Past Is Cancelled

As Musk continues his campaign to reprogram history like it’s buggy Tesla firmware, experts warn that facts may soon be replaced entirely with vibes and quote-tweets.

But at least now we know: if you serve your country in war, lead it through international crisis, and build a global coalition to stop tyranny—you’re probably just a low-tier patriot who failed to launch a rocket, build an app, or rename Twitter twice.

Thanks for your service, George. But next time, please check with the algorithm.

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